Norway

This is Bergen. A couple of weeks ago, I didn’t know much about it other than the fact that it was home to something called the Hanseatic League and, more recently, the Kings of Convenience.

Now I know that there’s a huge fish market in the middle of town, and that one can make up a rather substantial snack from all the free samples the fish sellers give out. I can also confirm that smoked whale tastes just as odd as it sounds.

I know what a fjord looks like from the clifftops, looking down the sheer rock face, and from the water, wrapped in blankets on the deck of a boat.

I know that Bergen wasn’t always the beautiful, peaceful city it is now. We spent the second night of our trip huddled round a firepit on a patio originally built as a German lookout during World War Two, listening to tales of resistance tactics.

I know that everything is just as expensive as everyone said it would be (and then some). 400ml of beer will set a drinker back the equivalent of €9 on one of the little terraces outside the colouredy old wooden buildings in that photo. We stocked up on duty-free and invited everyone over to our apartment every night.

By everyone, I mean the huge group of Irish people who had travelled to Bergen for the wedding of two vets – one Irish and one Norwegian. Their dogs were not, alas, allowed into the church.

I know now that Norwegian weddings are full of tradition and custom; from the beautiful traditional costumes, to the pre-dinner singsong, and the open mic for speeches. I know that if enough people clink their glasses at a Norwegian wedding reception, the bride and groom have to stand on their chairs and kiss, and that if the groom happens to leave the room, every remaining man will queue up to kiss the bride in his absence.

And I know that Norwegian people – well, all the ones we met – are amazingly funny, articulate and welcoming, do a great line in bad puns and emotional speeches, boast some great dance moves, and, more fool them, have issued us with an open invite to return.

We’ll definitely be taking them up on it.

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