Poker face
2009 June 16
I will never excel at poker, nor any other game requiring stoneyfacedness or a flawless ability to bluff. I can’t help myself. I start off with the best of intentions, chipping away quietly with so-so hands, but then I get dealt pocket kings and there’s a full house for the taking on the table and I come over all Monica Geller and bellow YESSSSSSSSS as I take the hand and knock out two of my opponents.
It’s only by pure fluke I manage to go on and win the game, but payback comes quickly and I’m first out of the second game in a spectacular crash-and-burn. I’m left sucking on my bottle of beer, silently cursing my big mouth.
I find learning to feign disinterest works wonders in situations like this… that and learning how to play poker, which I could never quite grasp.
Come round ours next time, we have cheat sheets!
I suck abysmally at Poker. I always thought I was a wonderkind online but playing in reality with a few drinks on you is an entirely different situation. I end up loosing interest in about 15 minutes and going all in on a pair of 4’s which always always backfires on me.
“I lost my money playing poker so I had to up and leave and now I ain’t a goin back to living that ole life no more…”
we’ll cover it
One of my closest friends is actually in Vegas at the moment for the World Poker Tournament. He began playing casually enough but now he makes his living through poker- so watch out. It could happen to you.
If only – lucky bloke!
My method is to immediately exclaim “Yessss, pocket aces!” once I’ve checked my cards, regardless of what I have. It worked beautifully last time I played as when I finally did end up with two aces I was able to draw someone in for loads and then say “Look, I did warn you…” when I won the hand.
I think a bloggery pokery night may have to be arranged, if only to showcase the mad bluffing skillz.
I’ve been playing Poker with Raptureponies a lot lately – she has a terrifying tactic of never checking her cards – it’s bluffing at it’s most lethal.
Where as if I get anything over a pair of twos I descend into giddy excitement and go all in. FAIL!